The Practice of Gratitude
… And How it Saved Me this Year
Can I be honest?
This year has kicked me in the teeth. It has ripped my heart out and stolen my breath away.
And so little of it had anything to do with COVID-19.
Only those closest to me have been privy to glimpses of the incredible pain, loss and accusation that have colored 2020 in the blackest nights of the soul I’ve ever known. And I’ve known many.
(And here, I feel compelled to say that, no, my dear Hubs did not betray me. He has been hurt through the events of this year as well, as we’ve held each other closer than ever to weather the storm.)
It’s been hard to see the light of day, to keep putting one foot in front of the other, to continue being present and blessing others and hiding our pain from those who would be ripped apart by it.
Last Christmas, before we had any inkling of what was going to come at us, our youngest daughter gave me a book. I’m embarrassed to say that although this book had been in print for a decade and sold over a million copies, I had only recently decided I’d like to read it. And so, it became my Christmas gift.
The book is Ann Voskamp’s One Thousand Gifts and, although she and I may differ a bit on theology in places, it was a book that arrived at just the right time. It’s a beautiful challenge to find joy and pleasure in the tiniest joys you stumble over each day. You can either pause, appreciate and hold dear those little joys or you can stumble right past them and miss them altogether.
As I immersed myself in Ann’s captivating ability to tell a story, I could sense the Divine intervention in the timing of my reading. A book about gratitude in the midst of such grief? A book that called me to find joy in the minutiae while I felt like I couldn’t even raise my eyes to see? It felt like adding insult to injury at first, but the practice of finding small things to be grateful for each day was like a starving child finding breadcrumbs.
And those breadcrumbs of God’s goodness led on and on until joy became easier again.
To be honest, there were days I skipped the discipline of jotting down a couple things that had blessed me, as recommended in Ann’s book. There were days I stared at the blank page, pencil at the ready before slamming the book shut, unable to find even one thing that had lifted my heart that day.
But then there were days when a friend would check on me or a tiny Grandchild said my name for the first time or I caught a glimpse of a lizard jumping into a bush or I remembered how a dear friend would smile at me as I preached. It didn’t matter how mundane – in fact, the smaller the joy, the bigger kick I got out of seeing it!
Indeed, God has been good to us this year. Things have come that tried to snatch away our joy, our purpose, our fight, our very lives. But I will testify that my Abba has graciously sustained me through more than I ever thought I’d have to endure. And one of the ways He did it? – through the practice of gratitude.
I would encourage you to begin this habit if you don’t already. Buy a journal that suits you and spend a couple minutes each day reflecting on and writing down the small gifts your Abba has sent your way.
Why write them down? As I’ve struggled through this year, even on days when my eyes were too blinded by pain to see a blessing for the day, I’ve at least been able to read previous entries that have lessened the feelings of being alone and unseen in my pain.
And why write down the tiniest gifts? The simple practice of finding God’s love reaching out to us through the smallest blessings has gotten me through. Sure, we can all say we’re grateful for the big things: Salvation, life, God’s love. But nothing has so transformed my everyday like finding that salvation, life and love calling to me through the infinitely small joys.
“I will bless the LORD at all times; his praise shall continually be in my mouth.” Psalm 34:1
Make sure you pick up my Free Resource for meditating on God’s Compassion when you are hurting! Find the Printable Scripture Cards HERE!
And for more reading on the importance of our perspective, read my blog post, “Recalibrating My Eyes” by clicking HERE.